Rehearsal 9, Tuesday 14th May 2002

I'm running a little late today. I figure it won't matter too much because we'll have moved on from the first act anyway. I'm wrong! As I come through the door, I'm greeted with:

"You're on"

…and find that we are repeating parts of Act 1 again so Andy can do his Postmaster stuff. In an effort to avoid incurring the wrath of the director, I drop straight into character. This is something us actors are able to do with ease, apparently.

My efforts are wasted, though, as David's hard side resurfaces and he cuts the lines he threatened to last time. To make matters worse, I sit down in a different seat than I did last week. This is where the Mayor and Postmaster are to have a 'secret' chat - which is a little hard to do with the Judge in their midst.

David sends me in shame to the correct seat and, as punishment, deletes some more of my lines. Determined to get back on his good side, I sit quietly until my next line, and actually manage to get most of it out before it, and next few, are cut too.

Thank goodness, we finish with Act 1 before I can be completely expunged. We move on to Act 2. I sit in the corner, finishing last week's diary and enjoying some excellent performances, like Barbara's surly Osip and Simon's terrified Mayor. I think we should probably keep Act 2 after all.

During a break in the action, I listen in on Julianne, Shelly and Jenny giving Simon advice on remembering his lines. There are some very good tips from their own experiences. There is also some special advice for me:

"Write your lines on the back of a stamp!"

Hmmm… You know, I'm not the kind of person who's sad enough to go through and calculate exactly how many of his lines have been cut from Act 1 - but if I were it would be 37%!

(It's not for my own sake you understand, but out of respect for Gogol. The great playwright has carefully created a rounded character in the Judge, and it pains me to see his creation reduced to a mere caricature.)

As I sit, I also check out the current hairiness level of the rest of the cast - it's ten days since we were asked to let our hair grow. I can't see anyone else who hasn't shaved at all, but some of them show signs of good sideburns. Mine are rather patchy so far - and an opportunity for all to laugh at my poor showing in one of the 'manly skills'.

The night is soon over and, as we are heading to the bar, David talks of having had stomach pains since the last rehearsal. He seems unwilling, however, to accept my reasonable hypothesis that it was probably stress brought on by guilt over his merciless cuts.

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